Doctor Who: An unearthly policeman
by Dalekbuster523
Summary: When PC Charles stumbles across a police box,he gets more than he bargained for when the local police station mysteriously disappears.
1. Chapter 1

Night. PC Charles roamed the empty streets of London, in full police uniform. He was a strange man. Charles had hair that blended into surroundings with small, grey eyes. Another strange thing about him was that he never needed to eat, sleep or drink. PC Charles had rarely done any of these things and when he did, he classed it as a treat. Charles was casually walking down a street, whistling when he spotted a police box that looked out of place.

A young man stepped out, a young woman and another man stepping out a few minutes later.

The first man threw he's arms out and said "Here we are! Leadworth. Earth. Just in time for a late night walk."

"Er, Doctor. This doesn't look like Leadworth." The young girl said.

"Amy's right. This isn't Leadworth. This is London." The second man said.

PC Charles approached these odd people.

"Damn right it is! "he said. "I don't know what you three were playing at, hiding out in a police box. Were you trying to be funny? Well, it hasn't worked. You three are under arrest for violation of police property."

"Actually, I think you'll find I was trying to lock myself up." Claimed the first man. "Isn't that right, Ponds?"

The second young man and the woman nodded in agreement.

"Ha! I'm not going to fall for that!" PC Charles chuckled. "Who do you think I am? David Cameron?"

"Does he look like David Cameron? "Asked the first young man.

"I don't remember him having chameleon-like hair." Replied the other young man.

"There isn't anyone else who has hair like that, Rory." The young woman said back.

"Thanks for making me seem more out of place." Said PC Charles sarcastically.

"Yes, well that's because you're a idiot, whatever-your-name-is. Yes, that's right, I called a policeman an idiot." Said the young man, holding up phycic Paper. "I'm PC Doctor Smith. These are my assistants PC Rory and PC Amelia."

"You said Amelia was too fairytale-y." Amy whispered.

"Yes, well, it is." The Doctor whispered back. "But PC Amelia sounds cooler."

"Well, it's a good job you said. I could've got in trouble myself for that." PC Charles said. "Call me Charles."

"Do you mind giving us a tour, Charles?" asked the Doctor.

"Okay. Gives me something to do." Agreed PC Charles.

* * *

PC Charles led them around the corner. He stopped and stared at a blank space, littered with rubbish blowing about.

"What? But…the police station should be right here. Right here!" PC Charles claimed, confused.

"Looks like another alien invasion." Rory pointed out. "Why can we never just have a normal day?"


	2. Chapter 2: The kidnap

"Back to the TARDIS?" asked Rory.

"Yes. Back to the TARDIS." Replied the Doctor, smiling.

"You have a TARDIS?" said PC Charles in amazement.

"You've heard of TARDISes?" said the Doctor, stunned.

"No. It just rang a bell. I don't know why." PC Charles said.

"I think there's more to you than meets the eye, Charles." Said the Doctor.

They ran back to the blue box sat waiting for them.

"Hang on. I believe you said 'TARDIS' not 'some random, blue police box'." Pointed out Charles,confused.

"Chamelion circuit. No, not the band!" the Doctor replied. "It's supposed to blend into it's surroundings but it stopped working and now it's stuck as a police box."

"You're not part of the police, are you?" he realized.

"Oh, well done! 50 points for Gryffindor! I'll throw in a brownie,too." The Doctor said, sarcastically.

The Doctor,Amy and Rory walked inside,but PC Charles noted this as a load of nonsense. He decided it best not to get too excited over the presence of something extraordinary just to be disappointed, so watched.

"Come on, Charles!" The Doctor called. "First one in the swimming pool wins a bowtie. Bowties are cool!"

PC Charles shrugged and let the curiosity get the better of him. He entered and gasped in amazement at the massive room surrounding him.

"This is breathtaking." Gasped Charles. "I'm sorry,I'm gonna have to leave. This surely must be too good to be true."

"You're going nowhere,Charles." Said the Doctor sternly.

"No,you can't kidnap him." Protested Amy.

"Why not? I've done it before. I'll happily do it again." The Doctor said in response.

"No, raggedy man. Please. It's wrong." Amy screamed.

The Doctor clicked he's fingers and the TARDIS doors clunked shut behind him.

"Ponds, show Charles to the bedrooms. I've got a police station to find." He ordered.

* * *

Amy and Rory led PC Charles into a massive room. In the room,rows and rows of beds laid waiting for their inhabitants and next to each one was a wardrobe and a table on which a desktop lamp stood on top. There were also shelves full of books after books under various childish labels such as "cool" and "Too lovey dovey".

"I don't need a bed." PC Charles said. "I don't need sleep. Never have, never will."

"That's not possible." Amy muttered. "No way is that possible."

"More plausible than waiting two thousand years dressed as a roman centurion." Rory said back. "I never want to do that again. Mental torture."

"We'll leave you here. You need some sleep." Amy decided. "Night!"

Amy and Rory left.

* * *

Charles was about to run after them when he saw a woman hovering a few centimetres from he's bed.

"Doctor's new companion?" she asked.

"Seems I have no choice." He groaned.

"Make sure you keep him busy for me." She joked. "Hi, I'm Romana. Listen. I need you to tell him something."

"Why should I? I don't trust him. He kidnapped me!" Charles complained.

"Because it's important. Not just for you, but for the protection of the human race." She responded. "You must tell him this: the Zorgs have stolen your planet's emergency services. Not one bit of protection remains on Earth. Your planet is defenceless and vulnerable to all sorts of diseases." She told him.

"What can we do about it?" asked PC Charles.

"Oh, don't worry. The Doctor will think of something." She said confidently.

* * *

"Charles has been an age up there." The Doctor pointed out.

"He must have finally decided to get some sleep." Amy said. "I knew it! I knew it was impossible for him to need no sleep. I hate to say I told you so,Rory."

Rory shrugged.

All of a sudden,PC Charles charged in, looking quite white.

"What's wrong, Charles? Seen a Gelth?" the Doctor wondered.

"Gelth?" asked Charles, he's face scrunched up in puzzlement.

"Ghostly species. Not very polite. I offered them a cup of tea once but somehow they refused it." The Doctor replied. "I mean, how can you refuse a cup of tea? That's impossible."

"I didn't see a ghostly species, but I saw a ghost." PC Charles told them. "She was barking mad. A bit like you,Doctor,only she was a woman. Called herself Romana."

"Romana? Not seen her in ages!" the Doctor said excitedly. "That wasn't a ghost,Charles. It was a hologram."

"She told me to tell you something." PC Charles continued. "Some people called the Zorgs have stolen Earth's emergency services. Earth is vulnerable to all sorts."

"Wonderful! Planet Zog it is. Home to the most ruthless thieves. Don't blame them,really,with their planet's lack of nearly everything. There isn't even a McDonald's." exclaimed the Doctor,operating the TARDIS controls.

The TARDIS took off,and PC Charles collapsed onto the floor.

* * *

It arrived on a flat,grey surface not unlike the moon. A dark shadow descended upon the TARDIS. A hand swooped down under the TARDIS and picked it up. It then headed down the planet's surface to a group of fierce looking naked giants surrounding a fire.


	3. Chapter 3:the tribe of planet Zog

"Right. You've had your fun and games, Doctor." PC Charles sneered. "You're under arrest for the kidnapping of a policeman. As soon as I find that police station, I'm going straight in there with you in tow and throwing you under lock and key."

Charles got out a pair of handcuffs and roughly locked them around the Doctor's arms. He then stuffed the keys to them in he's pockets and walked out of the TARDIS, dragging the Doctor with him. Amy and Rory followed…into a giant hand.

The hand jerked down quickly, causing Amy and Rory to fall off. PC Charles, however, managed to stay on with the Doctor. The TARDIS wasn't so lucky, though. The TARDIS nearly fell down on top of Amy and Rory, but they saw it just in time and dodged it.

"How did you manage to stay on?" the Doctor asked Charles.

"Easily. As easily as you kidnapped me." He replied. "I don't know why I didn't arrest you in the first place. When I first saw you, you looked like a funny one."

"Who are these people?" asked one of the giants surrounding the fire.

They were a mixture of genders. Some male, others female. All, however, were bold with big purple "Z"'s on top of their heads.

"I don't know. They came out of that…box." Replied the man who'd been carrying them.

"Oy! It's not a box, it's a TARDIS!" the Doctor interrupted angrily. "Sexy has a name, you know."

"QUIET, Stranger." Barked one of the giants. "Zeela,you wanted a pet. You may take one of them. The rest of you may take whichever one you want that's left."

"I'll take that bowtie guy." A female giant decided. "He looks funny."

"I'll have the ginger woman." A male giant said. "She is so fit. Like, celebrity fit."

"Hey! She's my wife." Rory protested.

"Not anymore." The male giant shouted back.

"Oh, the husband is more my style. He looks like he'll take no nonsense." A female giant declared.

"That leaves one male." Said the giant who let Zeela decide first. "Any takings?"

"Erm, yes actually." The Doctor said. "I'll take him."

" SILENCE!That is up to my daughter Zeela to decide, not you." The giant told him.

"I'll take him." Zeela said. "Then my eccentric little bowtie guy can have a friend."

The giant handed the Doctor and companions to their owners.

"I hereby declare this meeting over." Boomed the giant. "Meeting dismissed."

The giants all left.

* * *

Zeela carried the Doctor and PC Charles into a large,wooden makeshift hut.

"The Zorgs are not very civilised." The Doctor whispered to Charles. "They haven't evolved as much as humans."

Inside, she plonked them down on a massive wooden table on which sat simple things such as wooden pans, buckets and cutlery. To the left was a great big bin which a peculiar rotten smell came from. In the corner was a large bed.

"I'm off to sleep now. Goodnight." Zeela said sweetly. "And then in the morning you're going walkies!"

Zeela walked towards her bed and climbed in.

"I don't trust her, Doctor." Charles whispered.

"Why? She seems friendly enough. The Daleks are worse." The Doctor whispered back.

"It's nearly always the most innocent ones that turn out to be the worst." Charles said. "Believe me, I know".

"Well, there is a strange smell coming from the bin." The Doctor said. "But what harm could a massive girl do really? She's only massive."

"I think we should check the bin." Decided Charles. "There's something about it. I just now there is."

The Doctor carefully jumped off the table and onto the bin without making a sound and lifted the bin lid up. Somehow, he managed to stay on the lid as the bin lid swung open to reveal dead bodies.


	4. Chapter 4: A sexy summoning

Amy sat up slowly, wiping sleep from her tired eyes. She was shocked to find everything around her, including the table she was sat on, was massive. They were made up of weak wood which Amy feared would fall apart any second and looked like it was crafted by cavemen. Her owner, a massive beaming bald man with a "Z" on he's forehead, wearing a orange toga, stared lovingly at Amy.

"I knew my eyes were right when I picked you." He declared. "You are so hot. I must make sure I make plenty of these mini skirts I've heard some people on Earth wear."

"Hey! I have a husband you know, slaphead!" Amy snapped back. "And I'm not willing to commit adultery with an oversized alien tribal man."

"And your feisty, too!" said the man, grinning. "I am so glad I picked you now. The other male Zorgs are going to be so jealous."

"Listen. You need to take me back to my husband." Amy said. "You take him to me right now or I'll tell him about you trying to steal me from him. And you won't like it when he gets angry."

The man laughed and said "Do you really think I'll take notice of an obvious bluff? You're my pet now, not your husband's."

"You think Rory keeps me as a pet? You have a weird way of describing marriage." Amy quipped.

"You have a weird way of describing Bad Wolf." Said the man. "Apparantley,Earth people describe it as meaningless graffiti in 21st century London. Anyway, it's getting late. I must get some sleep."

The man walked towards a massive wooden bed, which Amy noted as looking rather uncomfortable, and climbed into it. When Amy was certain the man was fast asleep, she sneaked outside the wooden hut where she found a massive dog. The dog looked like a rough collie, it's fur glistening beautifully in the sun. Amy clambered on and the dog ran off, wagging its tail, causing Amy to nearly fall off.

* * *

Rory awoke in similar surroundings. The furniture was also massive, everything the same as in Amy's hut. He's owner, dressed the same as Amy's owner, bent down unexpectedly and kissed him on the cheeks.

"Sorry, I'm taken." He said, wiping he's cheeks as if hoping all traces would magically wipe off.

"Except no one on this planet had picked you as a pet before me." She said almost proudly. "You're exactly the male creature I've been looking for all these years."

"Watch who you're calling creature before you refer to me as that." Rory said angrily. "Most people don't take kindly to being called a creature."

"But that's what you are on this planet. "she told him. "You look like more of a special creature, though. Oh, you look a lot more badass."

"Well badass is what you'll get if you keep referring to me as creature." He replied. "I'll be feeling very badass-y, which is bad news for you."

"No need to be like that, sexy." She said.

Rory looked in surprise as the TARDIS appeared out of nowhere. It materialised over him and he's owner, who looked in disbelief. Rory opened the doors and pushed he's owner out. He then closed them and let off a sigh of relief.

"Now, how does the Doctor fly this thing?" Rory thought.

All of a sudden, a hologram of the Doctor appeared.

"Hello Rory!" he said, grinning wildly. "If you're seeing this, then it means someone near you used the word "sexy". Luckily, you seem to have pushed this person out. Or at least that's what I'm seeing. Yes, I can see you! It's more of a ghosty whosty thing than a hologram, to be perfectly honest. Anyway, back on subject. I messed about with the TARDIS so she'd arrive whenever anyone said "Sexy". This triggers a hologram of whichever version of me you are travelling with. Now,you're probably wondering what I mean by version. Well,I'll explain later. What's important is that this is a handy mechanism for whenever we are in danger. Mind you, it'd sound a bit odd saying sexy to a dozen daleks during a dalek invasion and frankly, I don't know how we're going to avoid looking like paedophiles if there's an alien invasion in some girl's toilets somewhere."

"One question, Doctor." Asked Rory. "How do I fly this thing?"

"Easy! Just run around the controls like I do and pull any old switch, press any old button, excetra excetra." The Doctor said. "It's as easy as ABC, which is a great Jackson 5 song. Did I ever tell you I saved the Jacksons from an alien singing virus that could have prevented Michael Jackson from singing Billie Jean? Afterwards, we all had a cup of tea and I taught Michael Jackson the moonwalk."

"You taught Michael Jackson the moonwalk?" said Rory in surprise. "Ok,I've heard it all from you now."

"Yep! And then I accidentally fell in a hot tub with Janet Jackson." Said the Doctor, blushing at the hot tub part. "Anyway, better go otherwise I'm really going to drain the TARDIS's energy."

The hologram disappeared as if it was never there. Rory took the Doctor's advice and ran around the console, pulling every leaver and pressing every button in sight. The TARDIS made it's signature dematerialising noise.

* * *

Back at Amy's hut,her owner carefully picked up a sharp knife and cleaned it with a cloth. He then ran out the door and headed in the direction Amy went.


	5. Chapter 5:Knives and Wifes

"OW!"Screamed the Doctor in pain.

"What is it? What's wrong, Doctor?" asked PC Charles.

"I kidnapped you. You should be celebrating." The Doctor said.

PC Charles laughed and said "You may be my kidnapper,Doctor,and I may be ready to arrest you when we find the police station, but I still care."

"That's incredibly loyal of you, Charles." Commented the Doctor.

The Doctor turned to face Charles and said "I reprogrammed the TARDIS to materialise around anyone who says the word sexy. The TARDIS has a Psychic link in my mind, as it does in yours now you're a time traveller, but it's stronger in mine. Somebody's said sexy and the TARDIS just told me. Which means, someone has the TARDIS."

"Two things. One. What if somebody with a criminal mind says "sexy"?" He pointed out. "Two. Why sexy?"

"Shush! We need to be in private before we call her sexy!". The Doctor said.

"We are in private. Are you going blind?" PC Charles said. "We're in the TARDIS, you berk!"

"Oh,of course! How could I be so stupid? I said the word Sexy." The Doctor exclaimed.

"So did I." said a familiar voice approaching them.

"RORY!" said the Doctor, swinging around to face him.

"I never knew you shared a hot tub with Janet Jackson." Rory blurted out. "Don't tell Amy,but can you give me her number?"

"You want to share a hot tub with someone other than you're wife?" said a shocked PC Charles. "You know, throughout my years of being a policeman, I have always seen that as unjust."

"Not if Amy's in the hot tub with me too." Rory said.

"All this over a hot tub?" said the Doctor in disgust. "I don't get humans at times. Always making a big deal over everything. Anyway, back on track. I think it's time we found Amy."

* * *

Meanwhile, Amy was digging her heals in the ground, stopping the dog in he's tracks. She got off and looked around, taking in her new surroundings. She was surrounded by buildings and buildings of emergency services. Police stations, hospitals and fire stations littered this part of the planet, with nothing else in site.

"Well, seems they've been stealing more emergency services buildings than I thought." Thought Amy.

Unnoticed by Amy, her owner ran up to her, brandishing a knife. Amy heard someone breathe on her and quickly turned round. She screamed in horror as her owner attempted to stab her.

* * *

The TARDIS materialised outside a hospital.

"But I don't get it." Said PC Charles. "How can you be so sure we're in the right place?"

"The TARDIS takes me wherever I need to go." Explained the Doctor. "Like a taxi driver, only without the charge for the journey."

"So basically better than a taxi driver?" asked PC Charles.

"Correctamundo!" he exclaimed. "That's a sev-en from me!"

"Doctor, you really aren't any good at impersonating that Strictly judge." Said PC Charles,smiling.

"Hey! You two! Stop bickering! Amy's being threatened with a knife!" shouted Rory.

The Doctor and PC Charles ran towards Amy. PC Charles grabbed the knife and anxiously tried to wrestle it out of the owner's hand. Meanwhile, Rory grabbed Amy's hand and dragged her down the rows of emergency services. The Doctor, while PC Charles was distracted,soniced at he's hand cuffs and ran. When PC Charles had finally got the knife out of the owner's hand, the Doctor, Amy and Rory were nowhere to be seen.

"DOCTOR!" he called, while handcuffing the owner. "I'm not finished with you yet! I handcuffed you for a reason. Now you come back here this instant or I'm afraid it's a longer prison stay for you!"

The owner kicked him hard and chased after the Doctor, Amy and Rory.

Carrying the knife, PC Charles ran after her.

* * *

In Zeela's house, Zeela woke up and noticed her prisoners had escaped. She walked outside, picked up a wooden axe, and ran.

* * *

In another house, Rory's owner woke up and noticed he was gone. So she picked up a wooden spear in the corner and left.

* * *

Zeela and Rory's owner walked towards a tree. They brought their hands round from behind their backs, in which they were holding lost posters. These were put on some trees surrounding a vast area. Soon, there were no posters left. Zeela and Rory's owner walked away. But as they walked away, they noticed the Doctor,Amy,Rory,one of their fellow giants and PC Charles in the distance.


	6. Chapter 6:A mass surrounding

"Quick, in here." Ushered the Doctor, leading Amy and Rory into a hospital. He walked up to a desk casually.

"Hello! Have you got an appointment to see the Doctor? "the female receptionist behind the counter asked.

"Well…erm…no, actually but we've got a big problem. A huge one, you could say. " the Doctor replied.

"Is it an emergency? "asked the receptionist.

"If you class a massive bald man chasing us with a knife, then yes, I'd say it is one." Said Rory sarcastically.

"We just need somewhere to hide. A bed,maybe."the Doctor said.

"Well, weirdly, we only accept medical emergencies." She said.

"Yes,well,there's no time to argue because frankly, we need a hiding place and fast." Said the Doctor desperately.

"I'm telling you. You can't hide here. We have patients who would appreciate it if you did not disturb them." The female receptionist said.

The Doctor ignored her and pressed a button for the lift. With a ping,the lift arrived and they entered. The Doctor pressed a button but the lift didn't go up. He kept jabbing it, but still nothing happened.

"Oh great. Now we're stuck in a lift." Complained Amy. "You know, I'm beginning to feel really claustrophobic right now."

The Doctor banned furiously at the doors, but they refused to open.

* * *

Following the Doctor, Amy and Rory's direction,PC Charles came across the same hospital. He ran in with he's handcuffed criminal and walked up to the receptionist's desk.

"Excuse me, Madam." He said. "I don't suppose you've seen an idiot wearing a bowtie, a feisty ginger woman and the feisty woman's husband?"

"Don't tell me you're another madman determined to hide from a giant Harry Hill lookalike." She sighed. "You're friends went in that lift over there."

Forgetting about he's captive,PC Charles ran towards the lift, pushed the doors open with he's hands and entered. He then closed them and pressed a lift button.

"I wouldn't bother. It's not working." Said Amy gloomily.

* * *

Meanwhile, outside the lift, the bald man stretched the handcuffs with he's hands and broke them free. He lifted out he's hands and strangled the receptionist behind the desk, who let out a big scream.

As soon as he heard it,PC Charles opened the doors and rushed out the lift, to find the dead body of the receptionist.

"Oh, you've really done it now." Shouted PC Charles angrily at the bald man. "You've just made your prison sentence at least about two years longer. You should be thanking me! I'm being generous, because if I was as strict as I can be, I'd give you 50!"

"Yeah…I think you might have to get some bigger handcuffs." Amy pointed out.

"That can be sorted out in no time, as soon as we get to the police station." PC Charles told Amy.

"I wouldn't bother if I was you." The bald man said. "You see, if you go any further with those plans, I can always kill you too. On this planet, there is no law when it comes to murder."

"That's why there were dead bodies in that bin."The Doctor realized. "People turn up on this planet unexpectedly when you steal resources from other planets and they try to escape. You lot don't like it and so you kill them! That's disgusting."

"We can always use the dead bodies for fuel afterwards, too." The bald man told them. "Which is why we need yours?"

"Well, I'll tell you one thing. You're not getting mine." Said PC Charles angrily. "Nor my fellow travellers here either."

"You have no choice in the matter." Barked the bald man.

"Well, I only have one thing to say to that in response. BYE!" The Doctor shouted.

They ran over to the doors and opened them, only to find millions and millions of Zorgs surrounding them.


	7. Chapter 7:The fight for freedom

"Okay, before you do anything drastic, can you please listen to me?" the Doctor asked.

"No!" shouted one bald man.

"Okay, fair enough. We'll…er, just slip past." The Doctor said, before whispering to the Ponds and PC Charles "Run!"

They pushed their way through the masses of bald people and ran down the rows of emergency services buildings, as the Zorgs pursued them.

"Doctor, we can't just keep running." Said Rory. "What are we going to do?"

"He's got a point, Doctor. We can't just flee and give them the satisfaction." PC Charles agreed. "We need to fight back. Show them what for."

"If there's one thing I've learned from thousands of years of time travelling, Charles, it's that violence is not the answer." The Doctor said. "I'd rather be a coward than a killer."

"Look, we either do something or keep running like headless chickens!" said Amy. "And I know which I'd rather do."

"Well, I for one am not fighting!" he said. "I've killed too many people over the years. I'm fed up of seeing deaths. Death is like a constant companion of mine. Like a dog, only less bark-y."

"Suit yourself, then, Doctor. But don't blame me if you're still running tomorrow morning." She said.

PC Charles and the Ponds approached the tribe furiously, like a bunch of soldiers going to war, and fought them fist to fist. As the fight erupted, the Doctor decided to watch in the corner, a fair few miles away from the fight. He watched the fatalities increase and men fall down, and sighed. When will they ever learn? Thought the Doctor, as the fight got more fierce.

Then, all of a sudden, he heard the sound of Rory's voice.

"Doctor! She's fallen." He shouted, he's voice quivering.

The Doctor ran over to Rory's side and looked sadly at the unconscious body of Amy.

"I told you! "The Doctor shouted angrily. "Stupid. How could you be so stupid? I told you not to fight, and of course, what do you humans go and do? You go and fight. Oh, Rory, why didn't you listen? Just once, why didn't you listen?"

"I didn't know she was going to fall unconscious, did I?" Rory argued. "I didn't know a bald guy with a Z on he's forehead was going to stick a spear through her. Why don't they care, Doctor? Why do they have no emotions for other beings?"

"Because we're different." The Doctor replied. "We're smaller, weaker and overall, more vulnerable. They see us as an easy target. That's why they use bodies smaller than themselves for a source of power. It's easy for them to do. We're easy for them to kill."

"Help me carry Amy to a hospital. Please." Said Rory.

* * *

The Doctor and Rory scooped up Amy's body and lifted her towards a nearby hospital. Once inside, they took the lift, one that worked this time, and plonked Amy in bed. They left the Hospital to find PC Charles, stood where the battle had took place, the rows of injured bodies now gone, as if nothing had ever happened.

"What happened to the tribe? "Asked the Doctor.

"They took their injured people away. You know, sometimes I wonder if my job is the right one for me." Said PC Charles.

"Yes. Yes, I do, too." The Doctor muttered quietly.

There was a short period of silence, and then Rory looked up in fear.

"Doctor! We're missing something obvious." Rory realised.

The Doctor and PC Charles looked confused at Rory, their blank expressions taking Rory by surprise, who couldn't believe the Doctor hadn't realised something so obvious.

"Where do you take people when their injured?" asked Rory.

"The hospital…ah. We just put Amy in danger, didn't we? "the Doctor said.

* * *

Meanwhile, in the hospital, Amy woke up and watched in horror as dozens of Zorgs sat up and got out of bed, walking slowly towards her.

"DOCTOR! "she screamed.


	8. Chapter 8: Killing of the injured

"Let me rescue her." Said PC Charles.

"Charles, you were the one who convinced Amy and Rory to fight in the first place." The Doctor said. "I'm not going to allow a guy who believes in violence to do my work."

"Doctor, I have experience on taking down people with knives." PC Charles told him. "I'm the only one of us who's fit for the job. I don't recall you saying you're a policeman."

"I'm not a policeman. I'm a time lord." The Doctor said simply.

"A time lord? That just sounds like something from a science fiction movie!" PC Charles remarked. "I see you've been watching Star Trek or something lately."

"No. You're ignoring the facts." Said The Doctor. "Keep up, Charles! Think about it. I use a time and space traveling police box. Isn't it a bit obvious that I'm an alien? How many bigger on the inside police boxes have you seen in London? Mind you, there was that time where everyone in my class at the timelord academy went on a school trip there. I want to go on a school trip again. I love school trips. Especially when you get the clipboards and a worksheet to fill in. Although, I never found the answer to question two."

"Can you two please stop arguing?" asked Rory. "It's giving me a headache and frankly, if anyone should rescue Amy, it's me. I'm her husband."

"Well, what are you standing round here for, Pond?" the Doctor said. "We haven't got all day! Unless something wibbly wobbly timey wimey causes us to have all day."

Rory ran into the hospital, glad to get away from PC Charles and the Doctor for a bit, who really doing he's head in at the moment.

* * *

"Typical." Thought Amy, as the Zorgs got nearer. "When you need the Doctor, he doesn't turn up. When you don't need him, he's there, with he's childish grin spread across he's face."

Then, the Zorgs stopped and stared at the door. Listening for something. The sound of movement. Then, the door swung open and Rory walked in.

"Get away from my wife!" Rory shouted.

"NO!" shouted one Zorg. "We shall never take commands from a tribe person's pet."

"If you call me pet one more time and refuse to leave my wife, I'll make your injuries more severe." He threatened.

"Was that supposed to sound intimidating?" asked Amy.

"Well,yeah." Rory replied.

"I don't think it worked." She said.

"The female is right!" barked the same Zorg. "Bring it on, pet. But should you actually fight, then we shall certainly fight back."

"You know, talking like Cheryl Cole really doesn't help when I'm angry." Rory quipped. " 'Bring it on, Pet.' Yeah…very threatening."

The Zorgs charged towards Rory with their weapons. Rory stepped on a nearby spear and pulled it out of the Zorgs hand. He fought he's way through the Zorgs, fighting weapon on weapon, like you'd expect Pirates to do with swords in a swordfight, some of them dieing in the process. After a good three hours of fighting, the hospital ward was full of massive dead corpses. Rory walked through them triumphantly towards Amy and walked back outside, Amy following behind.

* * *

"And where were you, Doctor?" Amy asked.

"I was….erm...trying to turn my bowtie into a sonic screwdriver." The Doctor said sheepishly.

"While I was trapped with a killer tribal race?" Amy said, annoyed. "You really need to get your priorities right. If it wasn't for my husband, I would've been dead by now."

"Wait a minute…Rory, why are you carrying a wooden spear?" the Doctor wondered.

"Because….spears are cool." Rory said unconvincingly.

"Don't lie to me, Rory." The Doctor said. "You killed them, didn't you?"

"Okay, fine, I did." Rory confessed. "But only to protect Amy!"

"How could you, Rory? You killed nearly an entire race! You've endangered them." Said the Doctor, disgusted. "They could be wiped from existence just because you wanted to save Amy. I think we better summon the TARDIS right now before anyone else gets killed!"

"But what about the emergency services?" asked PC Charles. "We are not leaving till we get them back to Earth."

"Easy. The TARDIS can tow them back to where they belong." The Doctor explained. "All we need to do is summon her."

"Well, come on, then! Who's going to summon her?" asked PC Charles.

"I will!" the Doctor shouted childishly. "SEXY!"

The TARDIS materialised around them and the alien environment of the planet Zog was quickly replaced with the TARDIS console room.

The Doctor pressed a few controls and pulled a few levers down, and the TARDIS set off, towing the emergency services buildings behind it across space.

* * *

"Is that all the emergency services buildings? "Asked PC Charles, after the umpteenth trip in the TARDIS across Earth.

"Yes, Charles. Yes, that's it." Came the Doctor's reply. "Now we just need to persuade the Zorg survivors to leave them here."

* * *

The TARDIS dematerialized as something or someone watched from behind a bush….


	9. Chapter 9: Thievery

The remaining tribes people of Zog hurried towards a sound they recognised from the previous day. The sound of the blue box. The Doctor,Amy,Rory and PC Charles stepped out.

"Ah,Zorgs!" the Doctor said cheerily. "Just the people I want to see. I have two questions."

"Fire away." Barked one Zorg.

"Question 1: You're a very unadvanced species, yet you manage to steal all of Earth's emergency services. How?" asked the Doctor.

"Before the time war, we stole time lord technology." The same Zorg explained. "A machine capable of teleporting anything, from paperclips to buildings. I believe you people called it a temporal teleporter."

"Why didn't you steal anything else? Why just the temporal teleporter?" he asked.

"Because we didn't have enough time to steal anything else." Came the Zorg's reply. "The timelord species were already aware of our break in into Daliexis's old type 20 TARDIS. Any longer and we would've been captured."

"Okay. 2nd Question: Can you please use the temporal teleporter to anchor the emergency services buildings on Earth?" the Doctor pleaded.

"And why should we do that?"asked the Zorg. "Zorgs will never obey the commands of a smaller species."

"Look. I could give you all your planet needs. Money, health care, protection and technology. But only if you anchor the emergency services buildings on Earth so they can never be teleported away again." The Doctor said.

"Never!" the Zorg replied.

"Then I'm afraid you leave me with no choice…." The Doctor said, brandishing he's sonic screwdriver and aiming it at the Zorgs.

The Zorgs disappeared, leaving the planet nothing more than a ghost town.

"What did you do?" asked Amy.

"I used the sonic screwdriver to transport them back to Gallifrey, before the time war started and before I put a timelock on it." The Doctor explained. "They should've arrived a few seconds after they left. The Zorgs will get caught for stealing timelord technology and Daliexis's TARDIS and will be taken to court by the timelords. They will then be declared guilty and forced into doing community service."

"So what now?" asked Rory.

"We track down the temporal teleporter and anchor the emergency services, so no one can teleport anything on Earth again." The Doctor decided. "The TARDIS can track down timelord technology."

* * *

A few minutes later, the TARDIS dematerialised next to what looked like a huge telescope covered in Gallifreyan symbols. The Doctor and companions ran out and the Doctor fiddled with the buttons on the temporal teleporter. A bright white light shot out and disappeared a few minutes later.

* * *

Once back in the TARDIS, the Doctor turned on the scanner.

"Er…just stay there a minute, Charles." Called the Doctor.

"What are you doing now, Doctor?" PC Charles sighed.

"Nothing. Just need you in one place." The Doctor said mysteriously.

"Okay, but I really don't know what you're up to. " said PC Charles, with a hint of superstition.

After a few minutes, on the scanner screen was one big, bold letter in green: "ALIEN"

* * *

Next time

The TARDIS arrives in Scarborough, where the TARDIS crew find a invasion of alien bedbugs. But these alien bedbugs are a lot more dangerous than those of Earth. One bite and you die continuously for all of eternity.

**Thanks for the reviews. Be sure to look out for episode 2 of this 13 part fanfiction series, "Don't let the bedbugs bite".**


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